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Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Hitting the Delete Button on Social Media, Maybe

“Wait! Perhaps you want to give it another chance?” I said to myself recently. I like what social media has to offer. However, I’m not too keen on some aspects. I joined Facebook on 2007 and Twitter around the same time. I mainly joined for the social aspect of it, to connect with friends and meet new ones. It took a while to build some presence on both places. Luckily, I connected with people I haven’t spoken to in years on Facebook. Twitter I didn’t use that much. Over time, my friend list grew on Facebook and I shamefully admit I felt special. When I decided to create the Creative Corner blog, I felt both Facebook and Twitter would help me promote it, along with my other writings. It did to a certain extent. I am grateful for that. After my hip surgery, I became more involved on Twitter participating in social work chat forums and debates. I met some cool people in the process. Overall, the experience being on social media has been positive with a few ups and downs.

So, why am I contemplating on leaving it alone?

As a writer (or for any artist), feedback is key to knowing if you’re heading in the right direction in your craft. Although I write for me, I wish I received more feedback on my writing. I post on Facebook and most of the time I get a “Like” or nothing at all. People have told me they read my words, but don’t comment. Comments help, whether they’re good or bad, because to a writer it allows one to improve or push the envelope a bit. I have one friend on Twitter who has been consistent in reading and commenting on everything I write. Whether it’s this blog or news stories, he offers feedback and support. I appreciate that so much. I know people are reading my work, I don’t doubt that. I just wish I received more feedback.

The other reason I thought about letting go of social media is the lack of connecting with people. I feel it’s taking away from the humanistic side of life. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t mind saying hello over a computer screen, but whatever happened to meeting in person to say hello? I notice the only time a person can see how one is doing is through a “Like” button or a Twitter message. Call me old-fashioned, but a personal letter, email, text, or phone call means more to me than just clicking a “Like” button on someone’s status.  It’s even hard to get people online to meet offline. I’ve tried. There have been times, I attempted to make plans or offer suggestions of meet-ups. It didn’t go too well. I think communicating through the computer is easier for some people. Maybe it’s insecurity or a great way to hide self from others. I’m not sure. Either way, it would be nice to meet in person, talk, and enjoy the environment than overworking the fingers on Smartphones.

Socially, life has become very boring for me. I need to get out more and be around people who are willing to go out, willing to laugh, and willing to enjoy life. I haven’t found that on social media and don’t think I will.  For now, it’s on to plan B.

I haven’t hit the delete button yet.


  1. Hi Dara,

    I think I"m hearing two main points from you:

    1) you'd like more people to comment on your posts
    2) you'd like to make more real friends

    These sound like great goals to work towards.

    Re your first goal, you may want to try:

    1) Commenting on other social workers' posts that were of interest to you
    2) Commenting and/or RT'ing the tweets of others
    3) Offering to guest post on another social worker's site

    These are some ways of building up traffic/interaction on your site... If you have already done 1 and 2 but are not getting RT/commented back, perhaps reconsider either whom/where you are RTing or commenting?

    Your desire for more interaction and feedback is not unique. Most bloggers [except for the big names] would like this... It is hard. I have found that most people are too busy to take the time to comment... Even once you have a large number of readers, usually only a tiny minority will tend to comment...

    It does/will help when some of us can make the time of point of periodically commenting on each other's posts...

    Last but not least, it takes time to build online relationships [as it does in face to face ones] - some people will be open and interested in having those grow and develop into face to face ones and others may not for a whole bunch of reasons that may have nothing to do with you [such as being overloaded, being fearful, being shy etc.].

    What if you didn't put all your eggs into one basket? In other words, don't try to make your real friends online for now... try to make them elsewhere - in class or work etc and let your online relationships naturally evolve - a few may blossom into something deeper; others may remain on a more superficial level but this way, you will be fine with however the chips fall, so to speak.

    You will get there; the key is grit :)

    Wishing you the best of luck!

  2. Also, you may want to follow/read some people who offer expert blogging advice like copyblogger, heidicohen, and/or stanfordsmith on twitter... you would then learn important tips like one way of encouraging comments is to respond to them [at your earliest convenience] :)

    1. Thank you all for your comments! Dorlee, you make some great points. We will definitely talk :)

  3. Just wondering what made you decide to finally join the social media frenzy? :) Okay, I just arrived from a consultation and my dr told me a metal hip is good choice. Now, I've read a lot of horror stories about it and will never agree to surgery if such were used. I'm also researching about ceramic hips but looking at stryker hip lawsuit piling everywhere, I'm out of my wits by now. Help!

    1. Thanks for reading! I've been part of the frenzy since 07! :) I hope not to have surgery again, one is enough. Did you have hip arthoscopy surgery too?